Hey there all, this is Johnston
Blackhorse's younger sister Shawndean, I am here to say my
farewell...for now. I am basically sitting here watching the cursor
blinking overthinking what I am going to write exactly so I'll just
write it. I'm moving from Las Vegas back to Tempe to put things back
together there for myself.
It's been exactly three years since I
made the decision to move from Arizona to Nevada to help my brother
out and now I am returning. The time has passed so fast I cannot
believe that I am really going back. Many of my plans that I made on
the transition back have fallen through; the place I was going to
live has changed many times, my ride back has changed many times and
so have the dates. But now I have a week left and I am teetering on
the edge of my seat, nervously.
In these last few months I have gone
back and forth on the idea of leaving and with everything in place
now I am taking the last jump. There were many reasons as to why I
have decided to leave. The main one is I want to get my life back
together.
Here I was working at a job that I
have been working at for two and a half years, part time getting my
paycheck bi-weekly and with all that I barely made my bill payments
on time, let alone save any money...versus my old job where I worked
full-time, got weekly pay with better pay. I am going back to my old
job by the way...basically waiting for me to get back there and fill
out the necessary paperwork. And if that doesn't work I got other
people that can help me find something.
Also I will be living with a very
close friend who is willing to let me stay rent free until I save up
enough to get my own place. All the other plans of where I was going
to live and with who fell through...but I honestly feel like this was
the best way for me to go. All the plans on how to get back to Tempe
fell also...so now I am just busing back with whatever I can carry
back. I am going to drop by Vegas in a few weeks/months for the rest
of my stuff.
It's crazy though, three years can
definitely change a person and their views. I came out here without
knowing anyone other then my brother...and he I didn't even know very
well. Of course I knew he was a good person, I mean he did help raise
me when we were younger. But still...I came out here knowing no one
else. Now the hardest part leaving is leaving my brother and all my
friends that I have met here.
I am going back to Tempe a different
person then how I left it and I am excited and nervous. I have grown
so much and I am so grateful to everyone for being so kind and
supportive to my brother and I during this difficult time. Even
though I am leaving I am going to stay in contact with my brother and
he'll keep me updated on the blog and everything that is going on
with him. I am going to continue supporting him in any way that I
can.
The past few months have had their ups
and downs...like the past...um...forever! Ha! But I know that we all
will get through them. I have about a week left before I board the
bus to Phoenix with some bags. I had left my job this past Sunday but
since then I was sick and it got worse until now...now I am finally
getting better. I was hoping to spend my last two weeks hanging out
with people and my brother but I already spent a week just getting
over this sickness. It is what it is.
So again thank you to everyone that
has been there and is still there for us. Everything is truly
appreciated and we are both very grateful. Please just know I am
still here in a way, drop a line for me to my brother if you feel
like it and I'll keep him updated on what I have been up to. I got
nothing but love and respect for all the people that continue their
support for us. You being inspired or motivated by us keeps us going.
So farewell for now.
`Shawndean Blackhorse
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